Once upon a time, there was an adorable young girl with a marketable voice and a hot body. She sold a trillion albums and then met the man who would marry her, and subsequently become the mirror of her gross inability to raise children by reflecting his relative fatherly competence. She proceeded to argue her case for custody by wearing only Vaseline as makeup and styling her hair* with Crisco, and appearing in public in this state 187 times per day while running people over with her Mercedes.A fairy** appeared and virtually revoked custody of her children, which was a blessing because it really opened up her schedule to accomadate the shotgunning of several more beers per day.
In the end, this young girl "visited" her children rather than raising them, "inhaled" her substances rather than drink/snort/inject them, and "replaced" her hair rather than wash it.
The End.
*Nasty-ass extensions
**The Law
No comments:
Post a Comment